The Most Important Relationship to Cultivate

Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter
Share on LinkedIn

There are loads of relationship dynamics at play in the work environment. Everyone is trying to successfully navigate their relationship web to achieve connection, acceptance, and results. Seasoned leaders know success isn’t solely about how much you know, how awesome your results are, or how long you’ve been in the game. The best leaders know success starts and ends with relationships. And, not just relationships with the “who’s who” of your industry. I am talking about the well-cared-for and finely manicured relationships you’ve developed at every level. This is where wise leaders apply focus. Still, one key relationship is often overlooked.

It is the number one relationship you need to cultivate, for your people and for yourself. This relationship isn’t often included in the context of relationship dynamics books, or relationship management discussions, yet it is the only relationship we have for our entire life. It is the relationship you have with yourself; and this relationship is at the epicenter of all the other relationships in your life.

Understanding yourself at a deeper level is crucial to your success as a leader. Consider the following questions:

  • How do you feel about yourself in general?
  • How about in change situations? Or in conflict?
  • What do you truly believe about yourself?
  • What do you want others to believe about you and why is that important?
  • When do you encourage or criticize yourself and why?
  • What about your relationship with yourself is strong?
  • Where is it weak or painful?
  • Where do you feel confident?
  • What things or situations do you avoid?

The list of questions goes on. The point is, you cannot fully maximize your relationships with others, until you fully understand your relationship with yourself; it informs every interaction you have.

At ADVISA, we believe there is an inner work of leadership and an outer work of leadership. The inner work is all about self-awareness and self-management. When leaders tune in to their self-relationship, self-awareness increases. As self-awareness increases, leaders can more effectively self-manage to give others what they need. This inner work is where authentic, long-lasting leadership development begins and where ADVISA shines. Using the Predictive Index Behavioral Assessment™ we help leaders get to their core quicker, where self-awareness is explored and unlocked.


For more on self-awareness and leadership development, check out this blog post and video from Senior Leadership Consultant BJ McKay on “Confidence, Fear and Decision Making.”

And, don’t miss “Make Time for Personal and Leadership Development” by Leadership + Organization Development Specialist Nora Elder.